So, I wanted to thank you.
The one reading this right now.
As of today, My Life with Tits is 13 months and 13 days old.
This is my 150th post. And through those posts, I have been able to reach out and situate myself within a community. I have been of help to some, but mostly lots of you have been so very helpful to me. My life has been enriched though this blog, because it has brought people like J.C. Prime and Karen and Mr. Pinkie and Transman and Tam and Maddox and Juno and A and about a hundred other really incredible people into my life. I am a better person because of your guidance and encouragement, and I thank all of you so very much. You have made the world a better place by being yourselves, and by helping me to be myself. I cannot overstate your importance to me.
As of today, I have 21,000 views and 1,200 comments. You really know how to make a guy feel loved. June 19, 2012 I had the most hits. It was a heavy traffic day on my Top Surgery Checklist post. And that makes me feel pretty good–I am happy to be of use, to be of some guidance to folks considering the surgery or the hormones or whatever. To be a person other people can glean some bit of knowledge or comfort from–it’s important, you know. It’s the most important thing in this life–to be of some help to someone else.
As of today, I have 306 followers.
Are you kidding me? God, you people. Thanks for reading. Thanks for caring enough to come back.
And while many of you read and choose not to comment, and some of you comment occasionally, and some of you comment frequently and we have moved into phone conversations, or actually met in person, there is that other group, the one I didn’t count on being a part of this blog.
There are the people I know in real life, my friends and family, who read and sometimes comment. And I wanted to speak to them for just a moment, to offer them some space here, as I so frequently focus my posts on trans folks.
A co-worker commented on my last post, and jokingly called it “internet staking.” Moo was kidding, of course, but there is a modicum of voyeurism going on: my blog is public, and I linked it to my Facebook account, so anyone I know (or don’t know) can access my blog, can read about my transition, can see pictures of my body as I heal from top surgery and read about my depression after that surgery. It’s pretty private stuff, sure, but I do it for a record for myself, and to be of help to others. I want to be a part of the trans community, so I have to put something out there, you know? You all can look and read as much as you like, all access, and can do so completely without my knowing. And I like it just fine that way.
Yesterday a different co-worker, in passing, said to me, “I’ve been reading your blog, and I feel like I know a lot more about you.” And she’s right, she does know more about me now than she did before, but she also knows more about me than I do about her. And again, I’m ok with that.
What I’m getting at here is that sometimes it’s hard to ask a trans person about their transition. It’s personal, and private, and you as a co-worker, or friend, or family member, might have questions that you just don’t feel comfortable asking me in person, because, oh, it’s hard to look someone in the eye and ask them about their sex change. Or maybe you’re not skeeved out by asking me about hormone injections, but we’re on the sales floor and my testosterone is none of the customers’ business. You’re right. But I want to give you space, free of the inappropriate context of the workplace, or the tension of a face-to-face interaction, to ask me anything you want.
And this blog is just the place; it’s part of the reason I started it. I don’t just want to help myself, I want to help others. I want to put a little more understanding into the world. Let’s demystify this then, yes?
So, to anyone reading this: ask away. Ask me anything; I’ll do my best to answer it. If it’s not within reason, I’ll politely let you know, and likely I’ll tell you why the questions isn’t reasonable, but I won’t get mad.
I do ask that you leave your initials, or a first name, or whatever you feel comfortable with leaving on a public blog, just so I can know who I’m talking to. But beyond that, any identifying markers are unnecessary. And if you’re a co-worker, let’s leave the workplace name out of it, yes?
This blog is a safe space for the gender neutral, gender fluid, gender variant. But it’s also a safe space for allies to ask any serious or silly thing they wonder about. So let’s get into it. 🙂
Be nice to yourselves,
Your Pal Eli