I have not recently blogged about my gender, nor have I thought about it too much.* I have gone home, and found me and K a place to live.** I have not taken any pictures of my chest, nor have I been giving it the attention it deserves.
Sometimes, your life occurs without too much fanfare or attention. And so, my life has continued, unabated. There are lots of behind-the-scenes things going on, lots of boring, yet stressful and important, changes and decisions have been occurring. And really, you fine readers deserve better than a play-by-play of me running around Chicago like a maniac trying to lease an apartment (I didn’t want to read all those Craigslist ads, why would I subject you to that level of hell?), or a recount of me making doctors appointments in Chicago, canceling gym memberships in Western Mass, emailing moving companies, or suffering my second summer cold in two months.
I started this blog to be a resource for other people thinking about top surgery, and for my own record of events. I think I have succeeded as well as I could have hoped for in both of those arenas. Now, as the blog title suggests, I think the focus will shift and I will write more broadly about, well, my life without tits. This has proven to be a more difficult task than I imagined.
I have had things to write about (my evolving relationship with academia, my fear of writing, my love of writing, the apology I owe my own writing, and my concerns for the future of this planet are all worthy topics for a personal blog), but I have been ignoring this blog. I have a history of ignoring writing when I can find something unproductive to distract me from it (Fucking Netflix) and I am not asking any of you to guess at what is wrong with me. I am sure it is deep-seated, and has something to do with my mother.***
I miss you guys. I miss Karen and Jacob and Edouard and J.C. and Tam**** and I couldn’t let the shame I feel about not keeping up better with my internet friends keep me away from said friends any longer. But enough about that.
In three weeks I will be home, in Chicago, and there will be plenty to write about, and I will keep in better touch. For now, just chalk this absence up to the minutia of my life piling to such an absurd degree that I could either deal with it, or end up on the street.
Let me close this post with a fine youtube video a good friend exposed me to, and be secure in the knowledge that I am back:
Be nice to yourselves,
Your Pal Eli
*There are both successful and unsuccessful public topless swimming experiences. Those I will discuss in a later post.
**It’s actually our old apartment, the one we moved out of when we moved to Western Mass. Weird, but convenient. It’s not long term, but it will work for now, for sure.
***A relationship which is another blog-worthy topic.
****And my god so many of you others that I can’t name all of you but I just picked the first few off the top of my head to make the point that I think of you all, and this space, when I am not here and just because I am not blogging doesn’t mean I’m not thinking about blogging.