The Countdown(s) Begins!

Today is one month to the day until my pre-op appointment with Dr. Medalie.  We will meet face to face, and face to tits.  We will make the final Peri- versus DI- method decision.  Then, two days later, so long tits.

And two days ago I got a package in the mail from his office detailing where and when my appointments take place, what to do the night before surgery (don’t eat, don’t drink, [and for good measure I have added “don’t sleep”]), and I also received a sleek brochure from Marena ComfortWear, in which Valerie (Dr. Medalie’s secretary) has bookmarked, circled, and highlighted the garment I am to pre-purchase (she has also noted that I am to buy the black, not beige model) and bring with me to surgery, because I will give it to them before they knock me out, and I will wake up in it after my tits are gone.

Some of the Countdowns I Have Going in My Head:

-19 more work days until we leave for Cleveland, which means

-32 more days until surgery, which means

-8 more weeks of binding (four weeks of the regular misery until surgery and then I’m guessing about three more weeks after surgery in this little beauty.  Actually, I have gone back to just the old sports bras until surgery, having given up on binding due to the abrasions and cuts and general pain and discomfort that was causing.  With the light at the end of this tunnel so near, I can deal with an extra half inch of shelf protrusion until the end of May.

And so now I am spending some of my time during the day thinking about all the things I have to look forward to after surgery.

The Following Things I Anticipate Greatly After My Chest Is Reconstructed:

-The feel of my guitar against my body

-The fit of my clothes

-K’s hand on my chest

-My hand on my chest

I also find myself thinking things like “this is the last rent check I will write with tits,” or “this is the last case of cat food I will buy with tits,”  which are silly commentaries but fill me with joy nonetheless.

Be nice to yourselves,
Your Pal Eli


8 thoughts on “The Countdown(s) Begins!

  1. I am so happy for you too, Eli. When I legally changed my name I was hoping for the same kind of finality that you will have post-op and had similar thoughts about if there could be a last time I would be signing my former name. I am also hoping that a little humor is still appropriate at such an important milestone in your life and would ask if you could please pardon my levity when I ask if you might be adding “out” to the name of your blog post-op?

  2. I also went through the same mental milestones! “My last time at work with boobs” or “my last time ordering coffee” or “2 more times putting on a binder” and such. It was like high school graduation all over again.

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